Jack and Jill

You know the rhyme...Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. Pretty innocent. But what if we put it in the context of marriage? If one partner falls, the other tumbles too. At bible study last night, I talked about how anxious I was to get my life started. And i was...too anxious. As a young girl, all I thought about was marriage, finding "the" one and having children. So I set out to find it.
I found the first one at 16. I was naive. And thought love came in the form of a Navy man. 7 years older and wiser. Sure, there were warning signs. Such as he was interested in a 16 year old. But hey...I thought it was great. I thought HE was great. We will call him Navy Man. I met him the summer I was 16 while visiting my grandparents. It was party, party, party. He was cute, older and interesting. After the summer ended I went home to Oregon. Unbeknownst to me, I had a very special visitor along for the ride. Navy Man visited me often and asked me to marry him. He even asked my dad. Talk about romantic. My pregnancy was a secret...we married in December. I quit high school, he got discharged from Navy (personality disorder) and we moved. To Arkansas. Yes, to the backwoods. Literally. The abuse started soon after. I was isolated, alone and scared. After 2 years I left. We divorced and he killed his girlfriends child. Talk about God's saving grace. He was Jack...he fell, I tumbled.
Number 2 came after I moved to my current location. I found him after dating....ALOT.
I was a single mom and living with my mom and dad. UGH. I couldn't wait to move along. So number 2....he was nice. And after Navy Man, I wanted nice. I didn't love him...not sure I liked him. But he was nice. And guess what! I had another special visitor again. We married a year after my first divorce. And I was visibly pregnant. Our first child was born in september that same year. Our second child was born april 2 years later and the 3rd born a year after that. I now had 4 daughters and a step son. And a life I was confused about. And unhappy in. And not enjoying. After 7 years of marriage, I checked out. Emotionally, physically and any other way I could. I hurt him....I tore my marriage down, brick by brick. All my fault? No. He had his own stuff going on. But, I fell....he tumbled.
When I fell, I fell for husband 3. This is it, folks. The end of my marriage rope. He was younger. Adorable and outgoing. Our relationship was.....well, not sure how to explain it. Wrong. Unbiblical. Destructive. Maybe, but I didn't care. And...you guessed it. Daughter number 5 came along after we were married 3 months. I must have very early babies...hahaha. Anyways....I have been blessed beyond belief inside this marriage. God saw me. He knew who I was, what I was doing and how I was behaving. Daughter 5 did not escape His notice. Yet, He blessed me anyway. We have been married 10 years, hubby became a christian 5 years ago and we had another daughter to boot. I call her our bonus. Is our marriage "fall" proof? No. But we work at it. It isn't perfect, and some days are harder than others. Do I love him all the time? Yes...sometimes he drives me CRAZY though. I don't always agree with him, don't always get along with him. But he's still adorable and he makes me laugh. I know he doesn't always agree with me and sometimes I make him INSANE. He's a good dad, loves all the girls. He's been their father a long time and loves them much. We work together. There is still residual from husbands 1 and 2. One is back in jail after some other child related stuff. And 2, well he's angry, sad and lives a heartbroken life. I know I am released though. My Father forgave me for my part. I have no more responsiblity in how things go for him. His choices are his own...his decisions his.

The thing is, Jack and Jill don't have to be impatient. They can take their time, go slowly and reach their goal together. No falls and no one tumbles. And they get to get the Living Water.