Ties That Bind

We are creatures of habit. We do the same things every day, talk to the same people, live our days like the one before it. We tie ourselves to many different things: people, belongings, animals etc. We tend to hold tight, tie the ropes tighter and hope nothing breaks.

So......what happens when someone chooses to break them? In our family we've recently had some pretty life changing, earth shattering moments. Someone we love has made a decision to die. They have not been successful. While this is good, we are left with the why of it all. We're left to ask questions that they won't answer, we're left to pray it won't happen again. We're holding desperately to the tie that binds us....they're trying just as desperately to cut it.

We've learned that life is more fragile than we thought, and we've learned that no matter what you think is going on, you really have no idea. We can presume to know the inside, we can take things at face value, we can gloss over the what we're looking at. In the end, we Just. Don't. Know.

We think that life is to be valued. And rightly so. We love the ties that bind us to other people, ties that don't restrict but allow growth. We love those that we're tied to. We hope they love us, too. We hope they value themselves as much as we value them. It doesn't always happen. We've learned that no matter how much slack you give, how much you hope that they'll remain tied....they may not want the same thing.

This doesn't just apply to this specific person in our lives. It applies to friendships, familial relationships, marital relationships...pretty much any relationship. Those ties that bind are strong, but sometimes someones will is stronger. This has been a hard winter for our family. We've had "stretched" cords, sorrowful breakings. Matty and I have had to figure out how to tighten the bindings that had stretched to far. On a whole, as a family, we've had to figure out how to love that someone who doesn't want to be here anymore. We're still having to figure out how to continue loving them.

The ties that bind us to others isn't a simple thing. There is history. There is love. There is sorrow. There is delight. There is shared experience. There is a lifetime of figuring it out and dreaming. When someone wants to break that binding, it's painful. Our hearts hurt for all the not understanding.

There is one tie that never breaks. And I know that He sees this all. He sees the ties that bind us all together, He sees the frayed edges, the broken rope. He sees where it's strongest and needs to be shored up. His tie to me is made of something stronger than typical cable. I know that. His tie to that someone is stronger than all the ties they're trying to break. I need to remember that. His grace is sufficient. No matter how things happen, I need to remember His plan is always perfect. My heart may sorrow....yet even in sorrow, I can rest. His will be done.

Please pray for our family. Please don't ask any questions. Thank you, dear ones, for allowing me to 'vent'.