I Forget

I forget numerous thing. Most notably my phone. And once a child taking a nap. Also, I forget sometimes to pick my kids up. Sometimes, I even pretend to forget things so I won't have to do them.

Recently, I read a blog by someone who opened their heart about their struggle with infertility. I was moved by their honesty, their candid words. And it led to me to remember that I forget.

I forget that there are people who would swap everything they have to have what I have. I forget that the way God has blessed me the richest is a struggle for many. I forget to see these precious gifts as such. I forget so often that each life was created, His plan.

Mostly it's when I've hollered 5 times to "Come down to dinner!", or when I've cleaned every room and given a 'fresh start'....only to find a week later it's like gnomes came through looking for treasures. I forget when grades are bad, when they inform me they have somewhere to be and it starts in 5 minutes. I forget when I'm watching ANOTHER Barbie movie and I just want to smother myself with a pillow.

I remember when I was pregnant with the tall girl. I was at a store and the cashier slowly counted the children with me. At this time, I had a step-son. As she finished counting, her eyes clouded over and she said to me "4 children and you're pregnant. You probably don't even want this one.". I looked at her in shock, quickly finished my transaction and left. My heart hurt, for both of us. After Harley was born, I had a similar experience with another gal. Her and her husband had been trying desperately to have a child. When her husband found out we had 6 daughters, he shoved his wife at me and asked me to "Please, rub off on her.". My heart ached, the sorrow in her eyes so deep, shame radiating from her face. I see it, you know. On other faces. I never know what to say.

I forget that what seemed simple for me is so hard for others. I forget that when we're pinching pennies and "borrowing from Peter to pay Paul" that God has richly blessed us. It's so easy to forget.....so easy to just let myself off the hook for forgetting.

I'm not saying that now everything will be perfect, and suddenly the roses will bloom and unicorns will lolligag around my house. I'm saying that I will be more sensitive, more aware and take more time to just enjoy. Life is still going to happen and things are going to be up and down. But I will not forget that my riches come in the package of girls.