Saturday, July 27, 2013

Winds of Change

The wind is blowing. It's blowing right through my life, shaking things up. Seems like money gets better, then suddenly it's gone. Seems like the kids do well, then suddenly there's a crisis. The winds of change aren't always welcome in my house. I tend to batten down the hatches, gather my chicks and pray that nothing changes at all. I want it all to stay the way it is now. Even with no money and with the girl troubles.

Guess What??! Change happens without my permission. Emily will head back to college, Chellsei will go to college for her freshmen year (ACK!...someone hug me!)and Savannah will be an official middle schooler. 13 is right around the corner for her. Harley hits tween age and Hillary continues to mother Reya and Reya continues to grow. Kaily, (sigh) will study for her SAT's and apply to college for the 14/15 school year. Medical school, folks. Our girl wants to be a surgeon.

Often, when the winds blow, we get scared. We like our rabbit hole. We like our comfort zones and our safety nets. We like to think that the way things are is the way things will be. We make plans and expect to follow them through. But the truth is, there is no plan that truly is our own. And sometimes, He likes to have the wind blow a smidge harder.

My mommy heart is aching. 2 girls moving on, a 3rd getting ready to in a year. My grandma heart rejoices in our grandgirl, yet I know her mommy's heart sorrows every day she gets older. Watching Reya, I don't have the same "please don't change" moments. Every day is a joy to see her grow. But with our own girls....PUH-LEASE....don't let that wind blow through my life! I haven't yet been successful in slowing time down, but that doesn't stop me from trying.

It's funny that it bothers me so much. I am constantly changing my house. There are days Matty comes home and looks around and says "Oh. You rearranged. Again.". Yes, I do it a lot. I also like to paint. (okay, Matty paints, I watch) I'm not against change, I'm just against the change happening with my family life. And therein lies the problem.

I. Am. NOT. In. Charge.

That phrase deserved it's own paragraph. Those winds are going to keep blowing, the change is going to keep happening and my life will get richer and fuller because of it. I need to remember that just because the girls are doing what God intends, (or not, depending on the girl)it doesn't mean that my life is losing anything. In most cases, I'll gain something. Even if it's just experience in a situation.

He IS in charge. His plan is perfect and unfolding in His time. I don't have to like how things change. Don't have to even agree with it. But I do need to trust in Him...and believe that all things will work according to His will. His word says that if He is for us, then who could stand against? More true words were never spoken.

As I finish up, I leave you with these words:
A BEAR ALMOST ATE SAVANNAH. (dumb wind)

3 comments:

  1. WWWWWWHHHHHHHAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!


    Figuratively or literally. A really real true bear?

    What the?
    You write this lovely little gripe about the winds of change, and then it's really about your kid becoming part of the digestive system of a BEAR!?!

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  2. Ok, Ok....it was a real bear, but it was WAY far away from her (or so she tells me) but it sounds so much better and dramatic. She was at camp and saw a bear. A really, real, true bear.

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