Nothing is going to happen....until it does.
You sit there, on your computer, at your job, in the coffee shop etc pondering your life. Wondering how you got where you are or how you're going to get to where you're wanting to be. You play an online game, catch the eye of a co-worker or see a guy in while you drink your coffee. Suddenly....something has happened.
You don't set out to do it...good gracious, you're a christian! You've prayed the prayers, you've sat in church and heard the sermon, you listen to the christian station on the radio. Nothing is going to happen....you're protected. Yeah. Until it happens. The enemy doesn't search out the ones who aren't God's....they're already his. He wants you...the one who IS God's, the one who belongs to the Lord most high. The enemy has joy in you falling and he finds many, many ways to help you down the hill.
Suddenly, you're sharing emotional ties with that guy online, you're talking to that female co-worker at lunch and you've met that cute guy for coffee a few times. Still, you tell yourself nothing is going to happen. Because you're not 'that way'. Then it does. And you're stuck.
Beloved, God does not want you to be fooled. He does not want you to fall. He is protecting you....but He will allow you to make choices and decisions and He will allow you to fall into those pits. He wants you to know that He is for you....you are often against yourself.
I didn't set out to wear the letter 'A'. I wasn't that way, either. A little flirtation, a little meeting and BOOM... After it happened, I made choices that led me into a deep, very deep, pit. I, where some aren't so sure, KNEW I was in a pit. I chose it.
I was redeemed. Only by Him. My life since hasn't been peaches and cream, but OH, I've come so far. We try to encourage our girls to stay away from things that may snare them, things that may catch them and trip them up. I've realized that Godly counsel from a parent comes across as parental counsel....no matter how it's phrased. We encourage our girls to search out other counsel...maybe we're off on some things and if so, we want them to get honest and Godly counsel!
The hardest part: Knowing what's real and what isn't. When you're talking to that online guy, that female co-worker, that cute coffee guy....the words are honey, the emotions rampant and the heart is deceitful. If you have an "other", chances are they're hurting over changed behavior and struggling to understand.
When we start to defend our "Nothing is going to happen...." you can bet the enemy is listening. You can bet he's already plotting and enjoying the strife it's causing. You can bet he's gleeful over the relationship tension and the brokeness that may follow. He's wily and crafty and has domain over this earth. He's going to try and make as many fall as he can while he's around. Guard yourself by being honest: Recognize you are NOT IMPERVIOUS. You are NOT immune to the enemy. Be honest before the Lord; He will take your burden and carry you through. There is nothing He is unaware of.
I leave you with this:
"A faithful witness will not lie, But a false witness speaks lies. A scoffer seeks wisdom, and find none, But knowledge is easy to him who has understanding. Leave the presence of a fool, Or you will not discern words of knowledge. The wisdom of the prudent is to understand his way, But the folly of fools is deceit. Fools mock at sin, But among the upright there is good will. The heart knows its own bitterness, And a stranger does not share its joy." Proverbs 14:5-10
Don't allow the enemy to sneak in. He is the author of lies, the prince of angst.
Nothing is going to happen...Until it does.
Saturday, January 9, 2016
Friday, December 18, 2015
We Wish You a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas!
Our year was full of so many things. Here are the highlights:
Emily began her senior year of college...come May we will have our very first college graduate. She also scrambled to find her focus. Great thing is...God is in the business of unscrambling and focusing! She got her very first pet...a blind, old cat she calls Ro-Ro.
Hillary and Jeremy are raising our sweet grandgirls. Piper had her very important 1st birthday and our sweet Reyasunshine turned 3. Their family started going to a wonderful church where they've plugged in and feel very loved! Jeremy continues to work 3 part time jobs to support them and Hillary's health issues continue to plague her. God is so great to give provision! We've seen some wonderful provision for their family! They have a kitty named Zoey who causes the girls much delight!
Chellsei began her junior year at BSU. She loves sign language and history...don't start a conversation about WWII if you don't want to go on for a bit! She began helping in the youth group at church this summer and continues to drum occasionally. She went on a weekend mission trip to Grandview, WA with our church over the summer; enjoyed seeing the people she served with in years prior. Her and her boyfriend celebrated their 2 year anniversary. Wonder what's next! God is so good to unfold adventures before our very eyes! Just a week ago, she flew off to Germany to see....
Kaily and Tim. His job took them overseas to Germany. They live in a small village and are enjoying it immensely. The possibility of deployment always looms; they're preparing themselves for that. On a journey to a small zoo in France, they saw some very wild....raccoons. We had quite the giggle over that. We skype often. The girls are enjoying their sister time until January when C flies home. They've kept us quite entertained with finding just the right beer stein for their dad and grandpa. T & K had to leave their dogs and hedgehog behind...there were tears shed! (We've found homes for dogs, hedgehog lives in C's room now. Our pet count is now 2 dogs, 1 rat and a hedgie. Soon, a Ro-Ro. :/)
Savannah is attending Sage International School. She is doing well and has friends! I know because I ask her every day. She recently (Tuesday)joined the braces gang. Didn't think she could get any cuter...I was wrong. She enjoyed her first mission trip; Grandview Wa for a week with our church! She LOVED it! After that, she went away to camp for 3 weeks this summer...2 as servant staff and one as a camper. She developed relationships and is looking forward to heading back next year! They've asked her to serve for the summer. She has switched her focus from becoming a vet to working with children. Also, she got to see her favorite band in concert and, after having an allergic reaction, got to meet Sadie Robertson! What joy! Can't wait to see what story God has written for her!
Harley is in 7th grade at The Village Charter Middle School. She has a heart for those around her and I love getting to see her sweet nature exposed. She was just in a play at school and let me tell you...she was AMAZING! One of the only kids without a script in her hand and she definitely has a flair for the dramatic! Her timing was great and she knocked the socks off the audience. She continues to show her artistic talent and we continue to be blown away. Really praying that God show us how to tap into supporting that and getting her where she needs to be to develop the talents He's given her.
Matt and I are doing well. We had a bit of a rough start this year. We've made new friends, rekindled with old ones and have continued to grow and heal as a couple. We joined a small group at church...it's great to hear perspective from people who have recovered from where we are or to share where we've been to others who may be heading there. I began working at H's school 3 hours a day. It's a great little part time job....God has reminded me that He had me where He wanted me for a reason. So, we'll see. Right now, that is our "Savannah braces account". Matt continues to work at the hospital. He loves working with the people and loves talking with those who ask about his AGAPE tattoo...who knew that could be a mission field??! His new goal is to get his GED sooner rather than later and move forward in the medical field. He also went to Grandview for a weekend...he loved building and helping around the church. He also loved the relationship building with others from our church! In August, we went and grabbed those Pryde's from NM. It was a wonderful time for just the 4 of us to have an adventure!
All in all....we're alive. We're all breathing and we're all growing. It wasn't a perfect year, wasn't a quiet one. We had lots of adventures this year, lots of tears, lots of laughter.
And I wouldn't change it.
God is so good, so amazing to love me. He is truly the reason for the season.
So...Merry Christmas, friends. May your new year unfold with joy and His hand unfolding your adventure.
Remember the baby born to die...so you could live with Him.
Our year was full of so many things. Here are the highlights:
Emily began her senior year of college...come May we will have our very first college graduate. She also scrambled to find her focus. Great thing is...God is in the business of unscrambling and focusing! She got her very first pet...a blind, old cat she calls Ro-Ro.
Hillary and Jeremy are raising our sweet grandgirls. Piper had her very important 1st birthday and our sweet Reyasunshine turned 3. Their family started going to a wonderful church where they've plugged in and feel very loved! Jeremy continues to work 3 part time jobs to support them and Hillary's health issues continue to plague her. God is so great to give provision! We've seen some wonderful provision for their family! They have a kitty named Zoey who causes the girls much delight!
Chellsei began her junior year at BSU. She loves sign language and history...don't start a conversation about WWII if you don't want to go on for a bit! She began helping in the youth group at church this summer and continues to drum occasionally. She went on a weekend mission trip to Grandview, WA with our church over the summer; enjoyed seeing the people she served with in years prior. Her and her boyfriend celebrated their 2 year anniversary. Wonder what's next! God is so good to unfold adventures before our very eyes! Just a week ago, she flew off to Germany to see....
Kaily and Tim. His job took them overseas to Germany. They live in a small village and are enjoying it immensely. The possibility of deployment always looms; they're preparing themselves for that. On a journey to a small zoo in France, they saw some very wild....raccoons. We had quite the giggle over that. We skype often. The girls are enjoying their sister time until January when C flies home. They've kept us quite entertained with finding just the right beer stein for their dad and grandpa. T & K had to leave their dogs and hedgehog behind...there were tears shed! (We've found homes for dogs, hedgehog lives in C's room now. Our pet count is now 2 dogs, 1 rat and a hedgie. Soon, a Ro-Ro. :/)
Savannah is attending Sage International School. She is doing well and has friends! I know because I ask her every day. She recently (Tuesday)joined the braces gang. Didn't think she could get any cuter...I was wrong. She enjoyed her first mission trip; Grandview Wa for a week with our church! She LOVED it! After that, she went away to camp for 3 weeks this summer...2 as servant staff and one as a camper. She developed relationships and is looking forward to heading back next year! They've asked her to serve for the summer. She has switched her focus from becoming a vet to working with children. Also, she got to see her favorite band in concert and, after having an allergic reaction, got to meet Sadie Robertson! What joy! Can't wait to see what story God has written for her!
Harley is in 7th grade at The Village Charter Middle School. She has a heart for those around her and I love getting to see her sweet nature exposed. She was just in a play at school and let me tell you...she was AMAZING! One of the only kids without a script in her hand and she definitely has a flair for the dramatic! Her timing was great and she knocked the socks off the audience. She continues to show her artistic talent and we continue to be blown away. Really praying that God show us how to tap into supporting that and getting her where she needs to be to develop the talents He's given her.
Matt and I are doing well. We had a bit of a rough start this year. We've made new friends, rekindled with old ones and have continued to grow and heal as a couple. We joined a small group at church...it's great to hear perspective from people who have recovered from where we are or to share where we've been to others who may be heading there. I began working at H's school 3 hours a day. It's a great little part time job....God has reminded me that He had me where He wanted me for a reason. So, we'll see. Right now, that is our "Savannah braces account". Matt continues to work at the hospital. He loves working with the people and loves talking with those who ask about his AGAPE tattoo...who knew that could be a mission field??! His new goal is to get his GED sooner rather than later and move forward in the medical field. He also went to Grandview for a weekend...he loved building and helping around the church. He also loved the relationship building with others from our church! In August, we went and grabbed those Pryde's from NM. It was a wonderful time for just the 4 of us to have an adventure!
All in all....we're alive. We're all breathing and we're all growing. It wasn't a perfect year, wasn't a quiet one. We had lots of adventures this year, lots of tears, lots of laughter.
And I wouldn't change it.
God is so good, so amazing to love me. He is truly the reason for the season.
So...Merry Christmas, friends. May your new year unfold with joy and His hand unfolding your adventure.
Remember the baby born to die...so you could live with Him.
Tuesday, November 24, 2015
Thankfulness
It's been a while. Not for lack of trying or inspiration; simply because the words wouldn't flow. But here I am. My annual Thankful blog.
If you had asked me at the beginning of this year if I would have anything to be thankful for, I would've probably said my kids and that's it. Good thing that God is truly great! My list is certainly bigger than 6 girls.
Here it is, my Thankful list.
-God. Without Him, I never would've survived the year(s) I've had. They've been hard, fraught with worry and despair. I. Have. Survived. And will continue to do so with His strength.
-Matt. I am thankful for him....thankful for his patience as we still figure out this married thing. (yes, it's been 15 years....still figuring it out) Thankful we can have fun while we do!
-Girls. 6...8 including grandgirls! These wonderful girls! So blessed to be able to watch their lives unfold; sometimes with joy, sometimes with sorrow...always with God's hand. Those sweet little grandgirls of ours are amazing...looking forward to more someday!
-Skype! Without it, we'd never talk to our sweet girl in Germany!
-Sons-in-law. One is a good father to those sweet little ones, the other is a co-adventurer with our far away girl. So thankful they are striving to be the men God created them to be.
-Rides home from college. Without those, we'd never see our U of I girl! She graduates this year...so proud of the woman she is becoming.
-Family. (including friends) You know this has been a hard road this past year (or 2) and without you guys praying....well, things would've been different. Thank you...you mean so much to me.
-Church Family. A body of believers who believe in us!
-Church Camp. Where S got to grow!
-Murphy and Whisper. And Jake...who now lives with my parents. Our lives would be boring without our fur babies.
-A borrowed vehicle. Whew! That was a wonderful blessing for our sweet C.
-Breath. Every day new.
There is so much more to find joy in, to be thankful for. I am so thankful that God is in the "business" of bringing hope to the hopeless. So thankful that His love for me doesn't change. That He is always writing my story even when I'm trying to break out of the margins. I'm so thankful for all the small moments that trumped the really bad icky big moments. So thankful that even in my absolute sorrow, He saw me and held me.
It's so important to know that wherever you are, someone else has been. Our lives are not always the shiny faces we put on. I encourage you to reach out. Someone else may have gone through the same thing, felt the same thing or knows exactly how you feel. Plus, the King of Kings is always available. His desire is for you to know Him; to be His. His love doesn't fail, there aren't stipulations to Him loving you.
I am so thankful for that love. That unending love and the gift of grace.
Happy Thanksgiving, friends. May you day be blessed, your table be full and your joy overflowing.
If you had asked me at the beginning of this year if I would have anything to be thankful for, I would've probably said my kids and that's it. Good thing that God is truly great! My list is certainly bigger than 6 girls.
Here it is, my Thankful list.
-God. Without Him, I never would've survived the year(s) I've had. They've been hard, fraught with worry and despair. I. Have. Survived. And will continue to do so with His strength.
-Matt. I am thankful for him....thankful for his patience as we still figure out this married thing. (yes, it's been 15 years....still figuring it out) Thankful we can have fun while we do!
-Girls. 6...8 including grandgirls! These wonderful girls! So blessed to be able to watch their lives unfold; sometimes with joy, sometimes with sorrow...always with God's hand. Those sweet little grandgirls of ours are amazing...looking forward to more someday!
-Skype! Without it, we'd never talk to our sweet girl in Germany!
-Sons-in-law. One is a good father to those sweet little ones, the other is a co-adventurer with our far away girl. So thankful they are striving to be the men God created them to be.
-Rides home from college. Without those, we'd never see our U of I girl! She graduates this year...so proud of the woman she is becoming.
-Family. (including friends) You know this has been a hard road this past year (or 2) and without you guys praying....well, things would've been different. Thank you...you mean so much to me.
-Church Family. A body of believers who believe in us!
-Church Camp. Where S got to grow!
-Murphy and Whisper. And Jake...who now lives with my parents. Our lives would be boring without our fur babies.
-A borrowed vehicle. Whew! That was a wonderful blessing for our sweet C.
-Breath. Every day new.
There is so much more to find joy in, to be thankful for. I am so thankful that God is in the "business" of bringing hope to the hopeless. So thankful that His love for me doesn't change. That He is always writing my story even when I'm trying to break out of the margins. I'm so thankful for all the small moments that trumped the really bad icky big moments. So thankful that even in my absolute sorrow, He saw me and held me.
It's so important to know that wherever you are, someone else has been. Our lives are not always the shiny faces we put on. I encourage you to reach out. Someone else may have gone through the same thing, felt the same thing or knows exactly how you feel. Plus, the King of Kings is always available. His desire is for you to know Him; to be His. His love doesn't fail, there aren't stipulations to Him loving you.
I am so thankful for that love. That unending love and the gift of grace.
Happy Thanksgiving, friends. May you day be blessed, your table be full and your joy overflowing.
Saturday, August 29, 2015
Just One More...
...kiss
....moment
.....day
......hug
............
The day is almost here. Tomorrow, our tall girl has her birthday. We are so joyful that we get to spend it with her; it's all tinged in "blue". The minutes went too fast, the days too full. And now, it's over.
She's going so very far away. We can't just drive to see/get/be with her. She is excited and nervous; has pretended all week that the day isn't coming. We all have kind of "ostriched"...head in sand, hearts in denial. Her sisters have soaked up moments, her daddy gathered hugs. I've treasured smiles and laughter.
This is one of those times I have to truly remember that she was never really mine.
She has always been His. He designed her, He gave us wisdom in raising her. He knew her future, He wrote her story. And now, I have to trust Him.
It seems so strange. They really do grow up and move into their own lives. It seems like they were babies just the other day....LOTS of other days!
Our youngest is 13 on Friday. Time is flying. It seems like there are never any "One More"s. Seems like life unravels faster than I can keep track of and girls grow quicker than I care to acknowledge. The irony is...I knew years ago I would 'lose' her to Germany. Just didn't know it would be this way.
I really am happy for them. Excited for the adventure that will soon unfold. I just, in my wistful heart, wish it wasn't happening. In my perfect space, our girls are all close by and I get to enjoy each one as grown women. While God has honored my heart in so many things, I recognize that my wistfulness is not His will. He loves me, He loves them. His plan is written, her story being revealed.
Her story isn't more important than any of the other girls'. It's just more noticeable, more prominent in our lives right this minute. So we cry, we laugh and we wish.
Just one more.
My dearest K:
I love you...every day, all the time...
...all your life and mine.
Enjoy the adventure sweets...we'll see you on the flipside.
....moment
.....day
......hug
............
The day is almost here. Tomorrow, our tall girl has her birthday. We are so joyful that we get to spend it with her; it's all tinged in "blue". The minutes went too fast, the days too full. And now, it's over.
She's going so very far away. We can't just drive to see/get/be with her. She is excited and nervous; has pretended all week that the day isn't coming. We all have kind of "ostriched"...head in sand, hearts in denial. Her sisters have soaked up moments, her daddy gathered hugs. I've treasured smiles and laughter.
This is one of those times I have to truly remember that she was never really mine.
She has always been His. He designed her, He gave us wisdom in raising her. He knew her future, He wrote her story. And now, I have to trust Him.
It seems so strange. They really do grow up and move into their own lives. It seems like they were babies just the other day....LOTS of other days!
Our youngest is 13 on Friday. Time is flying. It seems like there are never any "One More"s. Seems like life unravels faster than I can keep track of and girls grow quicker than I care to acknowledge. The irony is...I knew years ago I would 'lose' her to Germany. Just didn't know it would be this way.
I really am happy for them. Excited for the adventure that will soon unfold. I just, in my wistful heart, wish it wasn't happening. In my perfect space, our girls are all close by and I get to enjoy each one as grown women. While God has honored my heart in so many things, I recognize that my wistfulness is not His will. He loves me, He loves them. His plan is written, her story being revealed.
Her story isn't more important than any of the other girls'. It's just more noticeable, more prominent in our lives right this minute. So we cry, we laugh and we wish.
Just one more.
My dearest K:
I love you...every day, all the time...
...all your life and mine.
Enjoy the adventure sweets...we'll see you on the flipside.
Thursday, August 20, 2015
Away We Go
Wow! It's been MONTHS since I've sat at this computer and let it all out. So much is happening....so very much.
To start, we are now parents of a 7th grader and a 9th grader. Our youngest is in 7th grade people! Holy cow...time flies. Second, E is graduating from college in the spring. From. College. C is getting ready to go into her junior year at BSU. And K...well, K is moving to Germany. Be still my heart. I thought New Mexico was bad...Germany is worse. I mean, it's exciting and all, but it's SO FAR AWAY! We're hoping to go visit next year. Praying to go visit.
Matty and I are good. We've had some bumps: his back went out, our funds are being used up by doctor bills, thought our car was dead and had a few medical scares...but we're breathing and living and growing.
Right now all six of our girls are under our roof. It feels nostalgic. There is laughter, fighting and sniffles. It's amazing how they walk into the house and revert to their space in the house. They slip into their roles...even the married ones. Even the grown up college girls. They hug their daddy and cuddle up to me. They get irritated with each other in one breath and hug each other the next.
This chapter, this last year, has been a hard one. It's been full of sorrow , restoration, joy and tears. Every year unfolds...sometimes I wish they wouldn't unfold so rapidly. I can see glimpses of the future, glimpses of what it appears our girls' lives are going to be. Who they're going to be with, what they're going to do. The women they're becoming amazes me. And even though this is the "natural order of things"....I still don't want it all to happen.
It's strange, only 4 of us at the house full time. C comes and goes, life beckons her. E is up north. H has her own little family to take care of. K is (going to be) in Germany. Life is quiet with only S and Little Bit. I miss the chaos. However, I know that even as they move on, adventure will unfold. I know that my life isn't done being written, that my story is still unfolding. That Matty and I have a life to live that doesn't involve the care of others. That even though we are always their parents, we are suddenly just us.
This transition is going to be hard. The moving way far away thing is what's hit the girls the most. K is happy to go, to be able to grow and explore with her husband. But she's soaking up her daddy hugs, her sister time and her mommy snuggles. She's getting teary thinking of moving away. We're happy she gets to go....sad to see her go. S is struggling quite a bit.
We can't forsee the adventures God has in store; can't guess at His plans. He has unfolded each girls life in a way that surprises us. We are ever so thankful to have been blessed to be the parents of such amazing and fabulous women. We are so very joyed to watch them grow and change. As hard as it is to let go, I am reminded they weren't really ours anyway.
So...I'm taking a breath, holding on while letting go. This year will unfold, regardless of if I want it to or not.
Away we go.....
To start, we are now parents of a 7th grader and a 9th grader. Our youngest is in 7th grade people! Holy cow...time flies. Second, E is graduating from college in the spring. From. College. C is getting ready to go into her junior year at BSU. And K...well, K is moving to Germany. Be still my heart. I thought New Mexico was bad...Germany is worse. I mean, it's exciting and all, but it's SO FAR AWAY! We're hoping to go visit next year. Praying to go visit.
Matty and I are good. We've had some bumps: his back went out, our funds are being used up by doctor bills, thought our car was dead and had a few medical scares...but we're breathing and living and growing.
Right now all six of our girls are under our roof. It feels nostalgic. There is laughter, fighting and sniffles. It's amazing how they walk into the house and revert to their space in the house. They slip into their roles...even the married ones. Even the grown up college girls. They hug their daddy and cuddle up to me. They get irritated with each other in one breath and hug each other the next.
This chapter, this last year, has been a hard one. It's been full of sorrow , restoration, joy and tears. Every year unfolds...sometimes I wish they wouldn't unfold so rapidly. I can see glimpses of the future, glimpses of what it appears our girls' lives are going to be. Who they're going to be with, what they're going to do. The women they're becoming amazes me. And even though this is the "natural order of things"....I still don't want it all to happen.
It's strange, only 4 of us at the house full time. C comes and goes, life beckons her. E is up north. H has her own little family to take care of. K is (going to be) in Germany. Life is quiet with only S and Little Bit. I miss the chaos. However, I know that even as they move on, adventure will unfold. I know that my life isn't done being written, that my story is still unfolding. That Matty and I have a life to live that doesn't involve the care of others. That even though we are always their parents, we are suddenly just us.
This transition is going to be hard. The moving way far away thing is what's hit the girls the most. K is happy to go, to be able to grow and explore with her husband. But she's soaking up her daddy hugs, her sister time and her mommy snuggles. She's getting teary thinking of moving away. We're happy she gets to go....sad to see her go. S is struggling quite a bit.
We can't forsee the adventures God has in store; can't guess at His plans. He has unfolded each girls life in a way that surprises us. We are ever so thankful to have been blessed to be the parents of such amazing and fabulous women. We are so very joyed to watch them grow and change. As hard as it is to let go, I am reminded they weren't really ours anyway.
So...I'm taking a breath, holding on while letting go. This year will unfold, regardless of if I want it to or not.
Away we go.....
Thursday, June 4, 2015
Accountable
That is such a convicting word. Guilt inducing, even. As believers, we're supposed to not only be accountable to others, we're supposed to hold others accountable.
A friend of mine once told me that guilt and conviction are two different things. She was very right. Guilt can be swept away, under a mountain of sin. It can be induced by a friend's well meaning word or the way you look at another man. Conviction comes straight from God. There is no hiding, there is no pretending. In conviction, there is accountability.
When did we stop holding each other (fellow believers) accountable? When did we start looking the other way, allowing others' sin to be ignored? When did we fall into the "If it feels good" trap??
Trust me, I'm no better. I sin on a daily basis. I don't sit behind this keyboard in judgement. However....I've noticed an upswing in "tolerance" of other people's sins. I mean, really, who are they hurting by doing what they're doing? God will get a hold of them, right? Well, yeah. He will. Does that mean He wants us to sit by and watch while they make choices which separate them from Him? We say things like "Sin is sin, we shouldn't judge." But wait! That is where we're messing up.
Judgement is VERY different from holding someone accountable. Holding someone accountable is talking to a fellow believer and calling them out on what they're doing. Notice I didn't say fellow man. Here's the thing....believers have a different accountability. We are accountable to God. If you don't know Him, you don't know what I mean. That's just truth. If you do know Him, you get it...and even now you might be feeling accountable.
We live in a world that teaches our children to take what they want. To have sex if it feels right, to be attracted to people; not gender, to change their own gender because they 'feel' like they were born wrong. We live in a world that teaches our daughters to stand for what they want, our sons that the only woman worth having is the "perfect" one. We live in a world that says there are many different gods....different ways to heaven, hell or wherever. We live in a world that isn't accountable.
In my own world, there is only one God. He is the way, the truth and the light. He is the only way to heaven. In my world, gender is a gift; His marvelous creation and sex is a gift for marriage. In my world, our daughters are taught to be their husband's helpmeet. In my world, I sin. Daily. I am forgiven, hourly.
My heart has been so heavy lately. Our own daughters have made decisions that I've mourned over; those I love have made decisions I mourn over now. My heart is not to hurt nor bring guilt. My heart is to hold accountable. We really should remember that His word is the same today as yesterday and still hold truth. We need to remember that He died so we could live; that doesn't give us a free pass to sin as much as we want....it gives us a way out of the sins that we let hold us down. The pits we dig are often deep; so glad His arms are strong.
The only way through this world is with Him.
A friend of mine once told me that guilt and conviction are two different things. She was very right. Guilt can be swept away, under a mountain of sin. It can be induced by a friend's well meaning word or the way you look at another man. Conviction comes straight from God. There is no hiding, there is no pretending. In conviction, there is accountability.
When did we stop holding each other (fellow believers) accountable? When did we start looking the other way, allowing others' sin to be ignored? When did we fall into the "If it feels good" trap??
Trust me, I'm no better. I sin on a daily basis. I don't sit behind this keyboard in judgement. However....I've noticed an upswing in "tolerance" of other people's sins. I mean, really, who are they hurting by doing what they're doing? God will get a hold of them, right? Well, yeah. He will. Does that mean He wants us to sit by and watch while they make choices which separate them from Him? We say things like "Sin is sin, we shouldn't judge." But wait! That is where we're messing up.
Judgement is VERY different from holding someone accountable. Holding someone accountable is talking to a fellow believer and calling them out on what they're doing. Notice I didn't say fellow man. Here's the thing....believers have a different accountability. We are accountable to God. If you don't know Him, you don't know what I mean. That's just truth. If you do know Him, you get it...and even now you might be feeling accountable.
We live in a world that teaches our children to take what they want. To have sex if it feels right, to be attracted to people; not gender, to change their own gender because they 'feel' like they were born wrong. We live in a world that teaches our daughters to stand for what they want, our sons that the only woman worth having is the "perfect" one. We live in a world that says there are many different gods....different ways to heaven, hell or wherever. We live in a world that isn't accountable.
In my own world, there is only one God. He is the way, the truth and the light. He is the only way to heaven. In my world, gender is a gift; His marvelous creation and sex is a gift for marriage. In my world, our daughters are taught to be their husband's helpmeet. In my world, I sin. Daily. I am forgiven, hourly.
My heart has been so heavy lately. Our own daughters have made decisions that I've mourned over; those I love have made decisions I mourn over now. My heart is not to hurt nor bring guilt. My heart is to hold accountable. We really should remember that His word is the same today as yesterday and still hold truth. We need to remember that He died so we could live; that doesn't give us a free pass to sin as much as we want....it gives us a way out of the sins that we let hold us down. The pits we dig are often deep; so glad His arms are strong.
The only way through this world is with Him.
Sunday, May 31, 2015
The How
I'm not even sure. How does one really get over things that happen? How does a bible believing woman slip up so often and forget that she's already forgiven the very thing that she's complaining about?? How?!
What a word! I get asked 'how' a lot in my daily life. The girls ask me how to do something, my husband asks me how to word something. The How is very important. Yet....I can't seem to get it myself.
I find myself struggling with all the 'hows'. Yes, I've forgiven Matty. Yet....I guess I haven't. I thought I did. But then the 'hows' came up in conversation. As in "How could you (Matty) say....or do.....". And I sit in my unhappy square, struggling with the 'how'.
Funny thing is, I already know HOW. God. He's the 'how'. All through scripture, He is VERY clear. TRUST HIM. We do NOT have to lean upon our own understanding. We don't have to actually answer the HOWs that come up. He is ready and willing to carry all the burdens associated with that tiny, 3 letter word.
Well.
I always amaze myself. I am always amazed at how (HAH!) easily I want to sling those burdens up onto my back. Um, Erin, WHY? Good Golly! I don't even know. Apparently, somewhere down the line, I have decided to believe that I am not important enough for the Almighty to bother with. I have decided that I can do it myself. That's when I get stuck worrying about all the HOWs. He watches and waits; always more than willing to carry them for me. Joyful and sobering all at once.
Tonight, we had a HOW conversation. Those are never pretty. They usually entail me talking a lot, with him nodding and looking a bit glazed. Not sure it's effective. Coming off the heels of this conversation, our Little Bit got sick. That just felt like the icing on a very terrible cake. And I'm sitting here, wondering HOW I'm ever going to survive.
I'll tell you. Grace. It's new every day. His love abounds; knows no limits. There is no HOW to God. He keeps every promise, bottles every tear. I may ask Him HOW...I may even doubt. He will just love me. His arms open wide; His mercy continual.
I don't know HOW other than Him.
He is the reason my marriage is surviving, even with the HOW conversations. He is the reason our girls are growing well and we have food. I don't actually have to know HOW, I just have to trust.
What HOW are you struggling with? There isn't anything He isn't working on. Nothing He isn't seeing. He knows your heart, my heart. He knows HOW. Let Him love you through it!
What a word! I get asked 'how' a lot in my daily life. The girls ask me how to do something, my husband asks me how to word something. The How is very important. Yet....I can't seem to get it myself.
I find myself struggling with all the 'hows'. Yes, I've forgiven Matty. Yet....I guess I haven't. I thought I did. But then the 'hows' came up in conversation. As in "How could you (Matty) say....or do.....". And I sit in my unhappy square, struggling with the 'how'.
Funny thing is, I already know HOW. God. He's the 'how'. All through scripture, He is VERY clear. TRUST HIM. We do NOT have to lean upon our own understanding. We don't have to actually answer the HOWs that come up. He is ready and willing to carry all the burdens associated with that tiny, 3 letter word.
Well.
I always amaze myself. I am always amazed at how (HAH!) easily I want to sling those burdens up onto my back. Um, Erin, WHY? Good Golly! I don't even know. Apparently, somewhere down the line, I have decided to believe that I am not important enough for the Almighty to bother with. I have decided that I can do it myself. That's when I get stuck worrying about all the HOWs. He watches and waits; always more than willing to carry them for me. Joyful and sobering all at once.
Tonight, we had a HOW conversation. Those are never pretty. They usually entail me talking a lot, with him nodding and looking a bit glazed. Not sure it's effective. Coming off the heels of this conversation, our Little Bit got sick. That just felt like the icing on a very terrible cake. And I'm sitting here, wondering HOW I'm ever going to survive.
I'll tell you. Grace. It's new every day. His love abounds; knows no limits. There is no HOW to God. He keeps every promise, bottles every tear. I may ask Him HOW...I may even doubt. He will just love me. His arms open wide; His mercy continual.
I don't know HOW other than Him.
He is the reason my marriage is surviving, even with the HOW conversations. He is the reason our girls are growing well and we have food. I don't actually have to know HOW, I just have to trust.
What HOW are you struggling with? There isn't anything He isn't working on. Nothing He isn't seeing. He knows your heart, my heart. He knows HOW. Let Him love you through it!
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